Posted by Raul on July 2, 2011
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Butterflies that paint the world in beautiful colors.
Butterflies that change reality into a dream world.
Butterflies that tell lies instead of reality.
Butterflies that carelessly fly without aim.
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Where are you!
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I’ve seen a butterfly dancing in the air in front of me.
I tried, but I cannot touch it.
Sweet movements in the canvas of reality.
Bitter feelings of cross worlds.
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Logic against the so many times mentioned freaking guts.
Standing in the cold, sweating the heat of summer.
So many lists, so many thoughts.
Paralyzed by dull materials that conform reality.
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Sweet, beautiful butterfly that creates neon lights in the air with unsought movements or premeditated intentions, yet exists and calls for a revolution.
And the sun and the moon keep turning and turning!
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I know, I’m screwed! 
Raul
Posted by Raul on June 6, 2011
In any relationship that might be: marriage, parenthood, friendship, etc. the use of bad words or insults in reference to the person we are talking to as a way of joking is something I really dislike. I do understand and accept their use as part of the joke, and we know there are times when a thousand words cannot explain what one single bad word does.
But when those words are used to directly refer to the other person, it is my opinion that slowly but surely it helps deteriorate the relationship.
Say for instance, you make a silly joke to a loved one and the response to you, as a joke, is: “Jerk!”
It might be just a joke, just a word, nothing that has a real meaning or that comes from the heart of the person saying such word, yet (unconsciously) it does become already traveled road that opens the door for another road, and then another, then another, to the point that, without even knowing, the use of insults becomes the norm, putting the relationship interactions too close to the side of disrespect.
Everything we do repeatedly will become a custom and will loose its original intensity.
Having sex before marriage as another process of getting to know each other before deciding if marriage is for them, that I agree; while having sex as a normal element of any party, and just for the temporary pleasure it gives; that I disagree.
Discovering new technologies by their use as a way to learn, adapt to the new times while improving our efficiency, I agree; but getting the latest just to be with the crowd and don’t look like left behind, that I disagree.
In everything we do, if we do it very often, we will loose the magic involved in the process, and it’ll become just the base for something else to acquire in order to recover the lost magic of the first times.
For the same reason, if it becomes the norm to use insults to joke with a loved one, then pretty soon it’ll be necessary to use stronger words to retain the “fun” of it, to the point that someone external to the circle will become shocked by the way they joke with each other.
What has become a natural thing for some could be an extreme for the rest.
Joking with bad words brings resentment in the long run, and also creates a situation of disrespect, even if there was no intention of such thing from the part of those using the bad words.
That’s why I disagree with the use of insults as jokes when referring to a loved one. To keep a positive relationship in the long run, sometimes we have to “invest” in not going too far, as a way to always remain within the range of respect and love each other deserves.
My personal opinion of course.
What is your take on that? Do you accept the use of bad words as jokes with your loved ones?
Raul
Posted by Raul on May 12, 2011
It’s been with me for such a long time. So long that it seems it’s been forever.
At first I didn’t choose what kind of car it’ll be, it just happened to be there when I wanted one, and so it became part of my life. With a happy heart from my part we both started to roam the land together, without knowing what the future would be.
After so many years of trouble and continuous fixing to keep it rolling, it just became the way things are, without much thought about the practicality of that fortuity association, and even more, the logic behind the continuity of such association.
There was no reason to question why remaining the ownership when the absence of practicality was the norm. Maybe becoming accustomed to the same sight everyday; maybe the bothering thoughts of having to start from scratch at rebuilding and upgrading another one. This car runs good enough, even if it’s not what it’s really needed, so why bother with the restoration process in another car that has the desired characteristics.
But then, without the intention of searching or shopping around, after so many years, this other car showed up and presented many of the characteristics that seemed to be the ones originally desired.
Practicality is still absent, I must add and admit, yet the many different characteristics that make the personality of a car, and that are the ones that most appeal to my desires and needs, seem to be there.
It is not about the opportunity to switch cars, but rather the situation that, having appeared from nowhere, call the attention to the forgotten elements that create the deepest bonding that suppose to be the base in everything.
All the forgotten questioning that became buried in the past, to give way to a dull, numb driving of the already driven roads; and even more, defy the acceptance of continuity when the old questioning surface once again.
But then the doubts: What if, after going through the same long process of restoration, the impracticality still shows up in this other car? Wouldn’t that be changing everything just to get back to the same place? Why bother then?
At the other hand: Is it all these doubts because of fear to fall into the same situation after so much work? What if the different characteristics really make a big difference? Why not to give it a try?
Then again; is it proper to fail to the given word of continuity? And does such condition really exist? What about the roads that cannot be traveled because the actual car doesn’t adapt to the requirements of such roads? Should be a renounce to those roads the proper way of behavior? Or just a point of cowardice or social adaptation?
What a confusing situation!
To drive or not to drive! To restore again or maintain forever?
I can’t deny the excitement of just the thoughts of driving that other car in new, different roads; different to the normally traveled for so many years, once the restoration process is completed (if such thing exists!).
Maybe pondering the situation a little longer; maybe forgetting about it completely and just keep going as it has been for so long, to the point of becoming again “the way things are”
The eternal internal battle of logic and reason against feelings and intuition: Which one brings the permanent, or at least longer, state of internal harmony?
Why do we humans love to always create new problems to ourselves?!
Raul
Posted by Raul on March 31, 2011
They used to be all around, flying aimlessly, close to each other, silently existing for no reason at all. They were there, creating that strange feeling that seems to be proper of just once in a lifetime.
Sounds of a voice, a gesture, maybe a silly look of stranger eyes that were to be known little by little as time went by; they were born out of those and remained there for a short lived life.
So colorful! So vibrant! So alive! Butterflies that changed the elements around, the organization of things, the perception of life; just to leave behind spider webs as a memorial reminder of what used to be, and that now concentrate in catching the dust of time.
Their brief life reminding us all of the fragility of a moment in time: Dead Butterflies!
Raul
(Projections)
Posted by Raul on January 24, 2011
If you decide to diagnose your vehicle why it doesn’t start, check first the Crankshaft Position Sensor instead of the Ignition Pack and harness…it’ll save you a lot of time!
Last week I’ve been spending a lot of time with a vehicle that simply refuses to show what the problem is and why it doesn’t want to run. I’ve checked the ignition; timing; wiring; fuel delivery system; vacuum controls for leaks; etc, and it shows everything fine, yet it refuses to run!
For many years I’ve considered cars as a reflection of people; not only because we all tend to choose a car for a shape and characteristics that suppose to reflect us in many ways, but mostly because vehicles tend to “behave” in the same way we people do.
Take for instance this vehicle I’ve been working on (and still not finished); doesn’t it look like those situations where we are asking a loved one “What’s the matter?” and the only response we get is “Nothing”.
So we quietly think and analyze every memory we have from the past couple of days, trying to find a reason why our loved one is “functioning” in a completely different way than normal. We ask questions, but the answers don’t give any information of what the problem could be.
With the vehicle I’m working on, if the problem showed clearly, it’ll be really easy to apply a solution and the necessary corrections to make the car run smoothly again. The whole process would be quick and painless, and would avoid any unnecessary frustrations and loss of time.
With an honest answer to the question of “What’s the matter”, a change in common actions, or corrections of results about past ones, could mean the solution to the affecting problem, so the situation would be corrected, the problem solved, and friends again, without any misunderstandings and bad moments to everyone involved in the situation.
But just like some vehicles simply refuse to tell openly what the problem is, and somehow start a game of deceiving, with a loved one the same exact situation can happen, leaving us all like that car mechanic (me), who is trying to find the solution by just observation, testing and analysis of responses as the only way to get to the real reason for the change in operational mode.
I know in human situations many times the refusal to “talk” could be with the intention of not hurting feelings, but if both parts have love for the other, then the one with the problem could trust the other and be capable of openly telling what the problem is, and the other part should be able to accept a possible painful criticism that could mean the need of changing a personal behavior.
A car mechanic would want to know what the problem is in the vehicle because his intentions are to fix that problem, and is willing to accept the possibility to have to disassemble lots of components just to reach the part that is the reason of the failure; compared to the driver of the car that, normally, is not interested in fixing anything by him, but in only to have a good running car to use.
So, instead of being just drivers in our love relationship, we have to become mechanics ready to diagnose and repair any problem the relationship might incur in, no matter how much work might be involved from our part.
And like that stubborn car I’m working on, please, please, just tell what the problem is, instead of playing games that only make the mechanic think of the possibility of sending a still good working car to a junk yard!
We already have too many “good working units” roaming the lands in despair after being “discarded”, just because too often in their relationships they refused to tell what the problem was.
Raul
