Posted by Raul on July 5, 2011
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Looking to the surrounding world; wishing to fly free; afraid of the trade that freedom implies with its characteristic unknown, the bird stands by the open door of the cage, immobilized.
The dreams of the outer world and its wonders from the safety of the cage; the fears of the feeling of abandonment when not protected by the cage, yet free to fly and explore
Decisions, decision!
The little bird steps by the door and takes a quick look around, weighing the pros and cons of continuing with the infinite walk.
“It’s just a quick fly around to know”. Yet the wall of invisible air is still there, holding the fears and insecurities of the unknown.
The thoughts of remaining by the side of safety attack the little bird’s mind, while it fights to preserve the images of the infinite possibilities if only another step was made into the unknown.
The door of the cage was open, but just for a short time before it started to slowly move to become forever close. The little bird, desperate because of the closing door, pushes itself into its deepest thoughts, trying to find the solution to its confusion and indecision about its most logic move.
Time passes no matter what -the only reliable element of physical life- and the door finally become closed.
So the little, caged bird looks around its forever home, and the thoughts of flying free become the dream that never was, yet its heart smiles with relief.
“I guess I never really wanted to go”
Raul
Posted by Raul on August 16, 2010
When I was about 16 years old I was living in a different city than my parents and used to go visit them on weekends.
One Saturday morning, when arriving at my parent’s house, I found my father ready to go hunting with a shotgun, he invited me to go with him and I accepted because, at the side of spending some time together, I was curious about the firearm.
After walking for a couple of minutes my father asked me if I wanted to give a try to the gun and I accepted; how tempting to hold the gun, aim at something and pull the trigger to see and feel it in action!
With the gun in my hands I looked around to find a target and saw a small bird standing in a high, wooden pole, so I aimed to the little bird and pulled the trigger.
The small bird didn’t fly with the sound of the firearm, didn’t even start to flap its wings, it simply fell off to the ground without any movement, lifeless, dead.
While falling, even before it hit the ground, I was already feeling remorse for killing it. It was doing nothing, just standing there, being, alive, but because I didn’t think ahead of the consequences, I just aimed and shot, the little creature ceased to exist.
I felt really bad!
I remember giving the gun back to my father and telling him that I would never hold a firearm in my hands again. We walked back to his house in complete silence and had never talked about that situation.
I don’t know what my father’s feelings were at that moment and I don’t know if he knew what my feeling were, but I believe it wasn’t important then and is not today; nothing changed between us.
I don’t know if he remembers that moment but I do, and decide to write about it here in my blog.
More than 30 years have gone by and I kept my word, I’ve never held another gun in my hands and I still don’t like them.
Because of that moment I had the opportunity to think about people and guns and come to the conclusion that, not only guns are for destruction, but also how fragile life can be and how important is to protect it.
I was a 16 years old kid, curious about how a firearm would feel when fired and by making a stupid mistake I learned to respect life, anticipate consequences and stay away from guns.
Raul
